soothe

i had an amazing dream last night. well to clarify it was a dream that i had in a dream. it was perfect just like in 8th grade, there were kisses and hand holding and love. it was a dream where i woke up in the dream and remembered it was real. then i woke up in reality and realized it wasn't. what about my unconscious has decided that i can only process these feelings in a dream within a dream. are my walls that high?

when you took my hand as we faced the horrors that were closing in upon us i felt at peace and happy and safe. and waking up to the bright sunlight blinding my sleepy eyes it took me a while to realize that what i had believed so fully in my heart, that i was wanted and treasured for myself, was not true.

this of course has just reaffirmed my stance that good dreams suck because when you wake up and they arent true your life is just that much more hollow.